Mt Bierstadt topEveryone experiences doubt at one time or another. I think it’s unavoidable, unfortunately. But the key is to figure out what to do with that doubt.

It’s when I’ve gone through the toughest times in my life – when I’ve experienced the biggest doubt – that I’ve learned how strong I can be.

But when I was going through it, I had to make a conscious decision to choose to believe. Remember that word: choose. You have to choose to go the opposite direction of doubt – to believe.

I’ll tell you a story about a time in my life that I overcame doubt. And not only was I doubting – I was pretty much in the beginning stages of having a panic attack! And I’m serious about that.

It happened very early in the morning, around 5:00 AM, way up in the mountains. You see, I had decided that I wanted to climb up a mountain. The mountain is called a “fourteener” which means the peak is over 14,000 feet high. So I basically had to hike up the very, very steep face of the mountain, while having less oxygen at the same time – that means it’s way harder to breathe.

David (my husband) and I arrived at the base of the trail early in the morning, when it was still pitch black outside. You could not even see the top of the mountain. You could only see the trail in front of you. We had headlamps on just so we could see the trail. All was fine – I started walking. It was pretty flat at first. But then, all the sudden, the sun started coming up. Then I could REALLY see the top of the mountain! It was ridiculously high!

Mt Bierstadt trail

Here's what it looks like in the daytime - the trail to the top of the mountain you see there in the distance.

All the sudden I thought to myself, what the heck was I thinking? I have really bitten off more than I can chew this time! And on top of it, I thought I was starting to experience altitude sickness: dizziness, nausea and a slight feeling of panic! (But in reality, that was the anxiety speaking.) I started to seriously doubt myself and my ability to make it up that mountain. I literally talked myself OUT of hiking up the mountain right then and there. I stopped and said that there is no way I can make it.

Then David started telling me that most likely it’s not altitude sickness, and that I’m just worried. At first I was thinking, no, it is altitude sickness and I can’t physically make it up that mountain! Well, I stopped for a minute, took out a trail mix bar and munched on it for a minute – then I put it back in my pocket because I felt so nauseous I couldn’t stomach it. Then I realized that I was selling myself short. I thought of how disappointed I would be when I got home, because I was going to stop without even giving it a good effort. I was going to let fear stop me.

I decided to put forth my best effort, and I put one foot in front of the other. I decided that I owed it to myself to at least give it my best shot. (Here is when I made the choice to not let the doubt win.) I turned on my music to distract myself from my thoughts and forged ahead. There were so many times hiking up that huge mountain that I experienced doubt. At one point, I could only take a few steps, take a break, and then keep going. But you know what – I FINALLY made it to the top. And when I did, I was so surprised and proud that I had actually accomplished my goal. It may not mean a lot to some others, but for me it meant everything.

I actually realized at that moment that if I can overcome that much doubt, that much fear, then what else can I accomplish in my life? How many other things have I written off as “too difficult”?

What do you want to accomplish in your life that you have written off as too difficult? How many times have you doubted yourself – and let that doubt stop you dead in your tracks? What would your life be like if you finally let go of that doubt?  Take a moment to ponder what you want in  your life and believe in yourself.



Searching for truthI recently saw a quote that inspired me to write:

“Life Is A School, Where You Learn How To Remember What Your Soul Already Knows.” ~Author Unknown

This certainly rings true to me. Have you ever had that feeling that you have already experienced what you living at the current moment? Some people call it déjà vu.

I will tell you about an experience that I’ve had that goes beyond that déjà vu feeling…

When I was younger, I had this experience where I felt totally awakened – if only for a moment. This occurred when I was in a meditative state. First, I felt myself rising above my house, then rising above the clouds, then rising above the earth. Finally, I found myself hovering beside a nearby planet – looking at the earth from afar.

There was this guide with me, who was sort of showing me the grand scheme of things. You would think that all of that would have scared me. I mean, if I think of it now I can see how it could be scary. But the funny thing is…I actually felt more at peace than I ever had before.

I felt as though I was at home, and like that was the reality. It was only for a brief period of time, but I do remember the feeling of “knowing” all and feeling at ease with everything in my life. Now I know that we are here to learn. We are here to experience. Of course, many people would think this is a very strange type of story. And hey, maybe some would say it was a dream. I’m not sure exactly what it was.

Up until now, this has always just been a very personal experience that I’ve had – that I’ve kept mostly to myself.

But the thing that stuck with me the most is the feeling of comfort – the feeling of KNOWLEDGE that was just there. It was a great feeling – it’s very unlike the feelings of anxiety and fear that we go through during our lives here.

This is why that quote rings so true to me. I feel like when we are born, a block is automatically in place within us. We do not remember all that our soul knows because that would defeat our learning process. Of course, we must retain some of our knowledge, but definitely not all. We must learn lessons in this life and learn how to deal with difficult situations. And we also get to experience pure joy in happy situations.

Life is indeed a complex array of events and emotions. I have been through my share of difficult events and joyful events, as we all have. But I can appreciate that it is a learning experience, through and through. And one day, we will be awakened to all that is true – that we have always known.

Tara Walker



Cold Winter Months Ahead…

November 4, 2012
Snowy Day

TweetHere in Colorado, the days are becoming shorter. The dark, cold winter days are fast approaching. At first, I really welcome the cooler weather of fall, because I grow wary of the hot summer days. Yes, at first, the cool, brisk air seems so refreshing! It ushers in feelings of change for me. And then [...]

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A Mouthful of Thorny, Thistle Leaves!

November 4, 2012
Thistle Leaves

Tweet *This is a guest post by my good friend, Virginia Doan. Fall arrived weeks ago. The first frost came and went. Most trees have already lost their leaves and the surrounding landscape, although dotted with evergreens, looks pretty gray and bleak. I gazed at my sad looking garden and reminisced about the summer squash, [...]

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Who do you want to become? Start attracting the new you, now.

June 30, 2012

TweetI’ve just started reading Dr. Wayne Dyer’s new book called Wishes Fulfilled. From the beginning, a particular phrase really caught my attention: “Once you place a thought into your imagination about who you want to become, I encourage you to live from that end, as if it had already materialized into the physical realm.” Wayne [...]

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Spring Cleaning Extra Expenses

June 11, 2012
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Tweet*This is a guest post by Virginia Doan – giving us something to think about and work towards. I stumbled on Dave Ramsey’s talk show while driving home one day last winter, and since then I listen to his show at every opportunity. I like his show because his philosophy is very simple: Be free [...]

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When you slip back into old, negative thinking habits

April 5, 2012
Thinking in a boat

TweetSince I have been reading The Magic by Rhonda Byrne, I have seen how the power of gratitude has made a tangible difference in my life. However, I will admit that I got distracted and stopped my daily practices of gratitude for a little while. Instead of beating myself up about slowly returning to some [...]

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What is a Gratitude Stone?

March 20, 2012
gratitude stones

Tweet A Gratitude Stone is a special stone you hold in your hand while expressing gratitude. As I have written in my previous post, I am reading The Magic by Rhonda Byrne – it’s giving me many ideas for how to stay in a state of gratitude. One of the recommendations is to use a [...]

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Now Reading The Magic by Rhonda Byrne

March 14, 2012
The Magic

TweetI just started reading Rhonda Byrne’s new book called The Magic. Rhonda Byrne is also the author of the extremely popular book called The Secret. I read The Secret and also watched the movie. I am familiar with the concept of the law of attraction, so her new book caught my attention – especially with [...]

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Kseniya Simonova – Magical Sand Art Performance

March 10, 2012

Tweet Video of Kseniya Simonova – the amazing sand artist The first time I saw Kseniya Simonova’s sand animation… My teenage daughter came home from school excitedly and begged me to watch a YouTube video.  I wanted to start dinner and teach her patience and task priority, so as a consequence, she had to help [...]

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